When She's Happy
by BlueOwl90
Summary: Booth's brain tumor isn't discovered until after Brennan is inseminated.  Brennan and Booth must deal with the unexpected complications from his surgery.
1. Prologue

Author's Note: This is my first Bones fanfic. It is AU from the Critic in the Cabernet. Imagine everything in that episode happened up until the last interrogation scene. In my story, Booth does not hallucinate Stewie in the interrogation room and realize he can't father Brennan's child. The case is solved and Brennan goes ahead with insemination even though Booth has unvoiced misgivings about the plan.

Prologue

"Hey, Bones," Booth said, sliding into their booth across from her. They didn't have a case, but Bones had called him to meet her for lunch at the diner. She had sounded happy on the phone and he smiled. He loved any excuse to see Bones, but it was always nice when the opportunities didn't involve a decomposing body or an upsetting personal crisis. When she was happy, he was happy.

"Hey, Booth," she said, pushing towards him the cup of coffee she'd apparently ordered for him. Thanking her, he took a sip and watched her. She looked beautiful today. Her auburn hair curled softly on her shoulders and her blue eyes were bright and clear. He sometimes thought he could stare at her forever, although she would no doubt deny the feasibility of the idea if he mentioned it.

"So, what's up?" he asked, after taking in his lovely partner for a few moments longer.

"I, uh, I just got back from seeing my physician," she said hesitantly and Booth froze with the coffee cup at his lips. Ever since he'd given her his sperm, he'd tried to subtly press her for information about her plan to have a baby—their baby. So far, she'd remained oblivious to his desire for more involvement. Until now, apparently…

"Oh, is everything okay?" he asked, thinking of Bones all alone at the doctor's office. He felt a painful twinge every time the thought of Bones having their baby alone crossed his mind, but so far he'd brushed it aside. This was what she wanted and deep down, he knew he'd do just about anything for her. When she was happy, he was happy.

"Yes, everything is fine," she replied evenly, before allowing her face to split into a wide smile. "I was inseminated two weeks ago and today my blood tested positive for rising levels of HCG."

"You, you're pregnant then?" Booth stuttered. He hadn't expected things to move this quickly. He'd given his sample at the end of May and it was now mid-July. According to what he'd read on the internet, artificial insemination could take a few tries. He'd thought he would have more time… More time to convince her that he should be involved… That he should be this baby's daddy.

"Yes," Bones said, happiness still lighting her features.

"That's great," he said, trying to keep his conflicted feelings out of his voice. He truly was happy. Happy for Bones and happy that he was going to have another biological child. But he was worried too. What if she never let him be involved? He knew when he'd agreed to donate that there was a chance she'd never change her mind, but the thought of her having another man's baby had been far worse.

"That's great?" a loud, sarcastic voice with an English accent interrupted Booth's thoughts. Bones didn't react to the rude interruption, but Booth jerked around to look for the speaker. He felt a falling feeling in his stomach, like he was on a roller coaster. Stewie was back, sitting in his high chair beside their booth.

"Booth, what's wrong?" Bones asked, the radiant smile on her face dimming.

"Why are you here?" Booth demanded, ignoring Brennan. He hadn't seen Stewie since he'd gone to make the donation. He'd dismissed the hallucination as an extreme nervous reaction. After all, Sweets had said it was normal to be nervous about that sort of thing.

"Booth, who are you talking to?" Bones sounded more upset now, but it barely registered with Booth. He was too busy focusing on the evil baby that wouldn't leave him alone.

"So, this is actually happening then?" Stewie was saying. "She's going to have your baby and you're going to let her do it all alone! You're going to abandon your child!"

"No! That's not what I'm doing!" Booth insisted. "I'm not abandoning anyone!"

"You are! You're going to let your child never know his father!"

"No! Shut up! That's not going to happen. I can't let that happen!"

"Booth!"

Booth's eyes snapped away from Stewie and back to Bones. She was on her feet now and tugging at his arm. Realizing that everyone in the diner was now staring at them, he allowed her to drag him outside.

"Booth, what were you seeing?" she demanded once they were outside on the sidewalk. He could see tears in her large blue eyes and he wanted to comfort her, but despite the tears she had that determined look on her face that told him he'd better answer the question.

"Stewie," he said.

"Who?"

"Stewie Griffin… You know, from Family Guy," he said. As soon as the words left his mouth, he knew how stupid they were. Of course Bones didn't know what Family Guy was. "He's an evil cartoon baby," Booth elaborated before asking, "Are you alright? Everything is okay with your pregnancy?"

"Yes, but that's not important right now, Booth!"

"What do you mean? Of course it's important, Bones…"

"Booth, you saw a cartoon baby! Something is wrong!" she insisted, a tear finally spilling down her cheek.

"No, I'm fine, I just—

"No, Booth. First you saw Luc Robitaille, then a dead friend, and now a cartoon baby! Trust me! Something is seriously wrong! We need to go to the hospital! Trust me!"

Her desperation was apparent and Booth felt the falling in his stomach come back. Of course he trusted her. And if Bones said something was wrong… Something had to be wrong.

Author's Note: So, obviously this short little prologue was inspired by the interrogation scene from Critic in the Cabernet. I didn't re-watch that episode, so I don't think the dialogue is verbatim, but it's definitely similar. Things will diverge further from canon in the next few chapters, obviously.


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews. I fairly new to the wonderful world of Bones fanfiction, but I've read enough fanfic from other fandoms to know that parts of this story are dangerously close to being old clichés… Hopefully, however, my take will be enjoyable and somewhat original. Tell me what you think.**

Chapter One

Brennan sighed, closed her computer in frustration, and glanced at the sleeping man in the hospital bed. She'd been trying to write for the last four days, but the words simply weren't coming. Every time she sat down to write, she got distracted by the litany of worries swirling around her head. Booth was in a coma. Booth could die. She was pregnant and Booth might never get to see the child.

When Brennan had proposed that Booth father her child, she'd known she would raise the baby alone, but she hadn't imagined this situation. If things had gone according to plan, she would've had the baby and Booth would've been there as her best friend as he always was. She hadn't planned on burdening him with the responsibility of the "daddy" role since they were not romantically involved and she knew he still wanted to find someone to have a real family with. However, she had imagined he'd still be present in her life. In her perfect world, he would know the child that was biologically his as much as he wanted to, but still be free to pursue a woman with an open enough heart to marry and love him the way he deserved to be loved. Now, all of that was in doubt. Booth might never find that ideal loving relationship he believed was out there and he might never get to meet the gift he had so selflessly given Brennan. Instead, he might linger in a coma and then slip away from her forever.

Brennan tried to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall. She'd been so happy when the doctor had told her that she was pregnant a few days ago. She'd been so unable to contain her joy that she'd called Booth to meet her at the diner so she could tell him. Brennan had promised herself she wouldn't disrupt Booth's life any more than necessary or force any involvement on his part, but she'd been unable to help it upon hearing the news that the procedure had been successful. And Booth hadn't seemed to mind the interruption… For a split second, he'd seemed truly delighted that she was pregnant.

Then his expression had shifted from happiness to something like horror. Brennan wasn't very good at reading facial expressions, but she'd known Booth long enough that she could tell when he was upset. And this time he had definitely been upset. At first, she'd been fearful that his expression was directed at her. She'd thought maybe he'd had second thoughts and was angry at her for going through with the procedure. The true situation was even worse.

When Brennan had recognized that Booth was hallucinating, all the joy she'd felt about the baby faded and was replaced by fear. He'd been stubborn, but she'd forced him to go to the hospital. There, Brennan's fears had been realized. Booth had a brain tumor and needed surgery. The surgery had occurred four days ago. His last words to her as they'd wheeled him into surgery still seemed to be echoing in her head. _Bones, if I don't wake up… Even if I'm not there to see it, I know you are going to be a great mother._

Brennan bit her lip. She needed Booth to be there to see. She needed Booth to be there, period. At some point in the past four years, she'd come to rely on his presence and his guidance. She'd assured Booth she would love her child and she knew she would, but she'd been counting on him to tell her how to show and express that love. He had to wake up. Parker still needed his father and Brennan still needed her mentor when it came to all things emotional.

"Ugh…" Brennan quickly got to her feet at Booth's moan.

"Booth?" she inquired hopefully, leaning over him. His eyelids were fluttering and he continued to moan. "Everything is okay, Booth," she tried to reassure him.

"God, I must've hit my head really hard," he muttered, his eyes finally opening and staying that way.

"Booth?" Brennan asked again, unsure of his jumbled and slurred words.

"Bones," Booth said, his eyes finding her and focusing. "What happened?"

"You had brain surgery to remove a tumor, Booth. The procedure was successful, but you reacted poorly to the anesthesia… You've been in a coma for the past four days."

"A brain tumor?" Booth repeated, incredulous. "No, that's not right. I don't have a brain tumor. I just hit my head on the ice…"

"Booth, don't you remember? I made you come to the hospital because you were hallucinating. They gave you an MRI and found the tumor…" Brennan tried to explain. Disorientation wasn't uncommon after surgery, but Booth appeared very convinced he'd hit his head on the ice.

"I don't remember that, Bones. Was it after I hit my head on the ice? The last thing I remember was trying to get a blood sample from Lou Herrin… Did we get the sample? Was it a match?"

Brennan was at a loss for words. He thought they were still working on the Carlson murder. That had been months ago. In fact, it had been right after he hit his head on the ice during that case that he'd hallucinated for the first time. In retrospect, she'd realized it was probably an early symptom of his tumor. Now though, he didn't seem to remember his hallucination of Luc Robitaille or anything that had occurred afterwards.

"Booth, you didn't hit your head on the ice," she tried to explain.

"Yes, I did, Bones. Remember, we were getting the blood sample…" Booth was looking more and more confused. Brennan held back a frustrated sigh. She wasn't adequately explaining things to him.

"Yes, Booth, I remember that, but that's not why you are in the hospital now. The Carlson case was six months ago. Today is July 24. Four days ago you began hallucinating and I made you come to the hospital. They found a tumor. Does any of this sound familiar?"

Brennan was beginning to feel desperate. The blank look on Booth's face was terrifying her. He would remember, right? This was just temporary disorientation. It had to be. Brennan tried to consider the situation rationally, but her brain seemed to be stuck in panic-mode.

"It's July? It can't be July! Bones, I, I don't remember anything! That last thing I remember is hitting my head on the ice…"

Booth's face was now filling with panic as he absorbed her words. Seeing his fear snapped her out of her own state of panic. He'd just had brain surgery. He could not get upset right now. Quickly, she pressed the call-button and grabbed his hand.

"Booth, calm down, it's going to be okay. Disorientation is normal after surgery. I'm sure everything will start to make sense. Please don't be upset, Booth. Everything is okay."

Brennan was relieved to see Booth's face relax and the panic start to fade from his eyes as she rubbed his hand and assured him that everything would be okay. Both for Booth and for her own selfish reasons, she desperately hoped that the words she was speaking were true.

**A/N: I'm aware that memory loss rarely occurs like I've portrayed here, but I'm taking creative license… Please review and let me know what you think.**


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hey, guys, thanks for all the reviews and alerts. I really appreciate the encouragement.**

Chapter Two

Bones was acting strange, Booth thought as he watched his partner do some last minute interrogation of his doctor. She was about to take him home from the hospital, so her questions for the doctor weren't a surprise, but since he'd woken up in this strange new world of memory loss and brain tumors, something with Bones hadn't been quite right. She vacillated between being more emotional than he'd ever seen her and then acting extremely withdrawn from him. The worst part was that he couldn't understand her swinging emotional states because he had no frame of reference.

Normally, he knew what was going on with Bones. He could figure out what was bothering her based on what was happening in their lives or what case they were working on. Now though, he couldn't remember. He couldn't remember _anything. _Everything after the hockey game was a total blank. Bones had filled him in on the major events that had occurred since then, but without any memories, he couldn't draw any interpretation from the coldly-stated facts she'd presented him with.

Booth thought at first that maybe his brain tumor was responsible for Bones' behavior. Even hearing everything after the fact, the idea that he'd had a life-threatening medical condition was enough to shake him. It made sense that Bones would have been affected by it too. If he'd died, he would've left her alone like everyone else in her life had. His initial thought had been that her withdrawal was an attempt to compartmentalize his brush with mortality. Her emotional moments could be attributed to relief that he hadn't died. However, over the past few days, he'd become less confident in his theory.

Instead of fading as he got better, Bones' strange behavior was increasing. She was anxious around him. He wondered if something had happened between them to make her so uncomfortable. What if he had done something to scare her off? Maybe he'd finally told her how he felt and she hadn't felt the same way… Maybe she was sticking with him out of obligation, but really wanted to get as far away from him as possible. He couldn't help feeling like he'd done something wrong, but he had no way of knowing what it was. _Why couldn't he remember?_

"Ready, Booth?" Bones had finished playing twenty questions with his doctor.

"Yeah, I'm ready," he said brightly, plastering a grin on his face. His head still ached and it made analyzing Bones' confounding behavior difficult. However, he wasn't about to let on about his headache. Bones and the doctor might force him to stay in the hospital even longer and he certainly didn't want that.

As they walked out to her car, Bones stuck close to his side. He knew that she was just worried about his balance, but he took advantage of her proximity and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. She didn't lean into him like she sometimes had in the past, but she also didn't shrug off his touch, which was a good sign.

The car ride to Bones' apartment was silent. Bones was either focused on the road or deep in thought, so Booth had closed his eyes and willed his head to feel normal again; it hadn't since he woke up a few days ago. He was going to be staying with Bones for the next week at least. His doctor had insisted that he still needed supervision. He'd tried to protest, but one death glare from Bones had been enough to silence his protests.

"Booth, would you like soup for lunch?" Bones called to him once they'd made it up to her apartment. She was flitting around at high speed doing little tasks to settle him in while he sat like a lump on her couch. Her nervous energy was making him uncomfortable.

"Bones, I'm fine. Sit down and relax for a second," he said, patting the spot beside him on the couch. After a moment, she stopped flitting and complied, perching on the edge of the sofa.

"Do you need more pain medication, Booth?" she asked when he didn't immediately fill the silence between them.

"No, my head is fine," he lied. "Are you okay, Bones?"

"Of course I'm okay. You are the one who had brain surgery and is suffering from partial retrograde amnesia…"

"I know, Bones. You seem like you are more on edge than usual though."

"I'm just concerned you might suffer from post-operative complications. It was very stressful when you didn't immediately wake up from the anesthesia as you were supposed to. I was quite concerned and my concern doesn't seem to have totally dissipated yet. I apologize if my behavior is encroaching on your personal space. I can go write for awhile in my bedroom if you'd like to be alone." Bones' words were clinical, but Booth was easily able to translate them. _I was scared you might die. I'm still scared, but I'll go away if you want me to._

"Bones, come here," Booth said, feeling an involuntary wave of affection for his partner rise up in his chest. She was staring at him with those wide, blue eyes that were so full of concern and well-meaning that he just couldn't help himself. She scooted closer to him on the couch and he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her in close for a guy hug. At first she was tense, but after a moment she relaxed in his arms. She was warm and her soft hair smelled wonderful.

"I was afraid, Booth," her words were so soft and muffled against his shoulder that he almost missed them. He squeezed her a little bit tighter and for a moment he was able to pretend that he hadn't forgotten the past six months. He was holding and comforting the intelligent, unique, and wonderful woman that he loved. Nothing mattered except taking away her fear and assuring her that he was still here.

"Everything is all right, Bones. They might have sliced away a few memories along with the tumor, but I'm still here. I'm okay. Nothing important has changed," he told her soothingly.

"Booth, there's something…" Bones started, pulling out of their hug. Before she could say anything else, however, Booth's cell phone cut her off. Glancing down at the phone, Booth couldn't help but smile.

"Just a sec, Bones… Hey, Parker," he said flipping the phone open.

After talking to his son, Booth settled at Bones' table to eat lunch. Parker had filled him in on all the soccer games from the past six months and told him about visiting the hospital when he'd been in a coma. His son seemed to be taking his surgery and memory-loss in stride. Booth felt a little sad though. It was only six months, but considering how little time he got with Parker as it was, not remembering half a year of his son's life was a blow. He was acutely aware of how fast Parker was growing up. He definitely couldn't afford to lose months of memories of his son.

"How's Parker?" Bones asked, taking sips of her own bowl of soup.

"He's good. He told me about how his soccer team is doing. I wish I could remember going to the games…"

"Give it time, Booth. Some of it may still come back according to your doctors…"

"I know. It's just frustrating. I've missed so much of his life already and now I'm forgetting bits of it…" he vented.

"This is a one-time occasion, Booth. I know the situation isn't ideal, but there is no indication that your amnesia is anterograde," Bones assured him.

"Antero-what?"

"Your memory loss is confined to memories that were formed before your surgery. There is no indication that your ability to form new memories has been affected," Bones explained gently.

"Oh, yeah, the doctor explained that," Booth agreed before allowing himself to continue silently sulking about the missing memories of his son. "At least Parker remembers the time we spent together, even if I don't…"

"Are you really upset about losing out on those memories of Parker?" Bones inquired after a few minutes. Her tone held no judgment, just concern and genuine curiosity.

"I donno… It's not those memories specifically that I'm upset about. It's just that I've been on the sidelines for my son's entire life. I missed his birth, his first steps, his first day of school… Forgetting the last six months is just another slap in the face. I don't regret having Parker for a second, but if I had more kids, I certainly wouldn't repeat how Rebecca and I did it. I'd want to be there as part of a family, actively present and able to help raise them… I'm not sure I could handle being on the sidelines again," Booth tried to explain his feelings coherently while staring at his soup. "Bones?"

His head jerked up in alarm. Bones had stood so fast that she nearly knocked her chair over. She quickly grabbed her empty soup bowl and headed for the sink, turning her back to him. Still alarmed at her abrupt departure in the middle of their conversation, he tried again. "Bones, are you okay?"

He jumped to his feet, intending to follow her and find out what was wrong. Getting to his feet so quickly was a mistake, however. His head pounded and the room did a slow spin around him. He fell heavily against the table, knocking his soup to the floor with a loud clatter. Darkness started to tug at the corners of his vision, but then Bones was there, looping an arm around him and supporting his weight, so he didn't fall.

"Booth, you need to lie down," she said in alarm, leading him down the hall to the guest bedroom. He wanted to protest, but his head was pounding fiercely and his legs felt especially heavy. She carefully helped him into bed. "Booth, you need to rest. You've overexerted yourself. Close your eyes and sleep for awhile."

He tried to fight the impulse, but now that he was horizontal his eyelids began to droop with exhaustion. He hadn't realized how much energy the trip home from the hospital had taken out of him. He wanted to talk to Bones though, no matter how much his head hurt. Something had upset her, he was sure. He was fighting a losing battle, however.

As Booth's eyes drifted shut and he surrendered to sleep, he missed seeing the tears that were streaming down his partner's face.

**A/N: Please review and tell me what you think. I won't be able to update tomorrow, but expect the next chapter on Wednesday.**


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N: No Booth/Brennan interaction this chapter, but I feel like it's important that we get some insight into what Brennan is thinking and feeling.**

Chapter Three

"Bren, are you pregnant?"

Brennan had been finishing paperwork at her desk, but at Angela's words, she snapped around to face the artist. She was glad that Angela had at least shut the door to her office before loudly declaring her suspicions, but that did little to ease the knot in her stomach. In fact, nothing could ease the knot of stress she'd been carrying around in her stomach for the last two months. Probably, she mused, because she was carrying something else around and she had yet to disclose it to Booth.

"Why do ask?" Brennan stalled, trying to keep her tone as neutral as possible. Her mind was racing as she tried to determine the appropriate course of action. Was she actually busted or was Angela just speculating without any evidence? And if it was the latter and she successfully denied her pregnancy now, how angry would Angela be when the truth came out later?

"I ask, sweetie, because a few months ago you declared that you wanted Booth's sperm to have a baby…"

"Yes, that's true, but if you'll remember, I didn't proceed," Brennan said. That wasn't actually true, of course, but it was as far as everyone at the Jeffersonian knew.

After she and Booth had closed the Mortenson Winery case and she'd decided to go ahead with insemination, he'd agreed to keep things quiet until she successfully conceived and the threat of an early miscarriage passed. In fact, it had been Booth who reminded her that things didn't always go as planned and that she might really appreciate the privacy if there were difficulties. She'd concurred with his suggestion and ceased all discussion of her desire for offspring with her colleagues. They had all been convinced that Booth had talked her out of her insemination plan and she hadn't corrected them.

"Did you actually deep-six the idea though, sweetie?" Angela pressed.

"I don't know what that means," Brennan lied. She hated to feign ignorance and encourage the popular misconception that she failed to understand any and all idiomatic expressions, but she felt panic taking hold and she needed time to figure out what she was going to say. Plus, the only reason she was familiar with that particular expression was because Booth had explained it to her several weeks ago.

"You're going to make this difficult, aren't you?" Angela asked, giving a deep sigh and settling into the chair in front of Brennan's desk.

"Ange, I'm really kind of busy right now," Brennan said, looking back down at the paperwork for her and Booth's latest case. Angela wasn't going to be deterred, however. She snatched the paperwork off the desk and Brennan was left staring at the blank glass surface.

"Bren, you have gained weight in the last couple weeks and your breasts are larger than normal. You also ate twice as much as I've ever seen you eat in one sitting yesterday at the diner. I would chalk it up to stress eating, but sweetie, we all know that when you are stressed you forget to eat and actually lose weight. Also, I overheard Mr. Professional himself, Clark Edison, gossiping to the other interns that you ran off the platform to be sick last week," Angela laid out her evidence quickly and without taking a breath while Brennan continued to stare at her desk, feeling her face flush more and more.

"Now, sweetie, are you going to tell me the truth or not?" Angela's voice was gentle and Brennan felt tears threatening to spill down her face. She felt trapped, and lost, and scared… She wanted to run from this confrontation, but Angela was her best friend. Slowly, Brennan raised her watery eyes from her desk to meet her friend's earnest and concerned stare.

"I… It's true. I'm pregnant," Brennan finally admitted and before she could stop it, a sob escaped her throat.

"Oh, Bren, honey, what's wrong?" Angela asked as she rushed around the desk to wrap her arms around Brennan. Brennan couldn't speak though. It felt like something had broken loose inside her chest and now she couldn't stop crying.

The last two months had been terrible. Ever since Booth's surgery, the resulting memory loss, and his confession about Parker, she'd been miserable. She already loved the child that was growing inside her, but with every new pregnancy symptom she was forced to face how terribly she had betrayed her partner. Not to mention, she was still terrified about his health. She had nightmares where he relapsed or never woke up from his coma almost every night.

Brennan felt helpless as Angela led her from her desk to the couch, closed the blinds to insure their privacy, and continued to hug and comfort her. After several minutes of uncontrollable crying, Brennan was finally able to explain the situation to her friend in a halting voice, still punctuated by the occasional sob. She explained how Booth had agreed to help her. How he'd forgotten after the surgery. How she still hadn't told him. How he was still being so kind and attentive to her despite the terrible secret she was keeping from him.

"Bren, I don't understand. Why can't you just tell him? Booth might not remember agreeing, but he did. He'll be shocked at first, but why would he be angry?" Angela asked when Brennan finished explaining the circumstances and regained some of her composure.

"Be-because I took advantage of him, Angela! I know what Booth's views on children and family are. And I've known for years how badly the situation with Parker hurts him. And now I've gone and put him in the same situation. I know I'm not the type of woman he wants to build a family with and stay with forever. I know I'm not capable of giving him that, but I still took advantage of him to have his child…" Brennan suppressed the urge to start crying again. She had once to be so good at compartmentalizing, but the last few months at taken a toll. It was all she'd been able to do to pretend everything was okay around Booth.

"But Bren, he agreed to donate! It's not like you raped him…"

"Ange, he had a tumor the size of a ping-pong ball pressing on his brain! With that level of cranial pressure, his judgment was bound to be impaired. He was in no condition to give consent for anything, let alone make the decision to let me have his child. And if he'd been in his right mind, he wouldn't have consented!"

"You don't know that for sure, sweetie," Angela tried to comfort her. Brennan wasn't about to accept any comfort though. She'd betrayed Booth, was continuing to betray him every day, and she deserved to feel the crushing guilt.

"Yes, I can, Ange. I know for sure because I know Booth! I know what Booth's beliefs are. When he agreed to my plan, I should've immediately recognized that his behavior was aberrant. I should have known something was wrong. Instead, I took advantage of his cranial-pressure-induced lapse of judgment because I selfishly wanted use his excellent genetic make-up to have a baby… He trusted me and I took advantage of him. Ange, how could I do something so cruel to him?"

"Bren, you couldn't have known he was sick. You had no reason to believe his judgment was impaired. And even if it was, what's done is done. You are pregnant with his baby. He needs to know…"

"Ange, I don't know if I can tell him," Brennan said desperately. She recognized that at some point Angela's and her usual roles had reversed. Angela was rationally trying to come up with the best solution to the problem while she was indecisive and petrified. Booth was her best friend. He was one of the best people she'd ever met and she was about to hurt him and maybe lose him forever. The thought of losing him was enough to make breathing feel difficult and rationally analyzing the situation was way more complicated than breathing.

"Bren, he's going to find out you're pregnant. He probably hasn't noticed anything yet; I only noticed because I pay attention to detail as an artist. However, as you get further along it'll become obvious…"

Brennan allowed her hand to settle on her belly. "I know," she admitted. Her stomach was still flat, but her bust-size had increased in the last few weeks and she'd gained a small amount of weight as Angela had pointed out. At twelve weeks along, her morning sickness was finally lessening and her appetite was increasingly voracious. According to her doctor, everything was progressing perfectly. That meant that Booth would almost certainly put the puzzle together soon when she began to show more.

He was already concerned about her. Ever since his brain surgery, he'd been overly attentive and protective of her. This, of course, just made her feel even guiltier. Booth was so in-tune with her that he was unconsciously protective even when she was simply upset. She, on the other hand, was so oblivious that a tumor compressing his brain and causing hallucinations hadn't been enough to get her attention until he started talking out loud to an imaginary cartoon baby. He'd been sick and instead of protecting him, she'd done something that was going to hurt him.

"I will tell him, Ange. I really will, but I need more time. And I'll tell him soon, but you have to promise me you'll keep this a secret until I do…"

"Oh, sweetie, I will," Angela said, wrapping Brennan in another tight hug. "Bren, everything is going to be okay. No matter how messed up things are right now, when you're holding your baby girl or boy it'll all be worth it."

"I hope so," Brennan said. "I'm just scared he'll never forgive me."

"Bren, you'll never lose Booth. He loves you and he'll love this baby, no matter how he or she came to be," Angela assured her.

"But he loves me in a platonic way, Angela… He wants a family with someone he can be _in_ love with; someone who will love him back with an open heart."

"And you can't love him with an open heart?" Angela asked skeptically.

"No, I can't give him what he deserves, Ange. When I asked him to donate, I didn't intend for him to be involved because I wanted him to still have the opportunity to find someone who could give him the love and family he deserves. Now though, I realize that Booth will feel obligated to me and his child. I know he will do what he considers his duty as an alpha male, no matter how badly it hurts him. How will he ever forgive me for putting him in this position again?"

"Bren, you know I think you're wrong about having an open enough heart to love Booth, but let's set that issue aside for the moment. You need to talk to him and explain the situation. There's no way around the fact that this is going to change things between you guys, sweetie, but Booth will understand. You know he won't blame you and he deserves to know that you're having his baby…"

"I know he does… I just need a little more time."

"Okay, but you need to tell him soon. In the mean time, Auntie Angela is going to make sure her niece or nephew gets everything he or she needs…"

"Ange, I have been sufficiently taking care of my body's needs. I eat regularly and I haven't pulled an all-nighter in months," Brennan informed her friend.

"Those aren't your only needs, honey. This weekend we are going to go to the spa for some pampering… You need to relax."

"Okay, but I can't do the sauna or hot tub. Anything that raises my temp—

"I know. Don't worry; we won't do anything that could hurt my niece or nephew," Angela cut her off. This was the second time Angela had referred to her child that way and Brennan couldn't restrain herself any longer

"You do know that genetically-speaking—

"Yes, sweetie, I know. But there are all sorts of family, remember."

"Yes, of course," Brennan agreed, giving a single nod. "Metaphorically-speaking, you are my sister, so my child is your metaphorical niece or nephew."

"Exactly, and he or she is going to be absolutely adorable…"

Brennan didn't bother pointing out that there was no solid evidence supporting Angela's assertion. Instead she let Angela hug her again and imagined what her child might be like. It could be a girl with Booth's warm brown eyes and her hair… Or maybe it would be a little boy with a charm smile and her blue eyes… For the first time since the day she brought Booth home from the hospital after his surgery, Brennan genuinely smiled.

**A/N: So, my Brennan is a little more emotional than what we've generally seen in the series, but I don't see it as out of character necessarily. For example, I think of the episode Conman in the Meth Lab when Brennan realized she'd hurt Booth. She was clearly very upset when she confronted Jared. Now, in my story, she thinks she's hurt Booth again but in an even worse way. Let me know what you think. Next chapter we'll see how Booth is doing…**


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N: Thank you all so much for the feedback on the last chapter. I appreciate the encouragement. This chapter takes place about two weeks after Brennan's confession to Angela, so she's about 14 weeks pregnant and it's October if you're having trouble keeping track.**

Chapter Four

"Is Bones here?" Booth demanded, swiping his card and he mounted the forensics platform.

"Nope, you just missed her," Cam informed him as she leaned over to do something to the decomposing body on the stainless steel table. "She and Angela left ten minutes ago for the airport."

Booth frowned. He'd really hoped to arrive in time to take Bones to the airport himself, but his afternoon meeting at the Hoover had gone on for over two hours, so apparently Angela had gotten the job. Bones was doing some unavoidable promotion for her new book in New York and would only be gone for two days, but Booth felt uneasy about the trip. And although he was glad he'd been able to have lunch with Bones at the diner earlier today, the meal had done nothing to soothe his concerns.

Something was terribly wrong with his partner. He'd hoped that her strange behavior would ease once he'd fully recovered from his surgery and they started working cases again, but it hadn't. Over the past few months, it had gotten even worse. She seemed to genuinely appreciate it when he stopped by her apartment with food or otherwise reached out to her, but she never reciprocated and she never shared anything with him anymore. Instead, she was withdrawing further and further with each passing day. If he didn't know better, he'd think Bones was angry with him.

Booth knew her well enough, however, to know that she wasn't angry. Every time he forced eye contact with her, it wasn't anger or irritation he saw in her clear blue eyes. It was sadness and worry. Something was terribly wrong and she wouldn't tell him what it was. At first, he'd tried to pry the problem out of her, but she'd locked down like Fort Knox. It was terribly frustrating for him because he just wanted to help her, but after a few weeks he'd resigned himself to the fact that Bones wasn't going to tell him anything until she was ready.

In the mean time, Booth was determined to be there for her in any way possible. Part of this effort included coming by the lab and dragging her to lunch even on days when they didn't have a case. She rarely protested, although today she had been reluctant because she wanted to finish up paperwork before her flight to New York. Eventually she'd agreed and they'd gone to the diner. Bones had been edgy throughout the meal however; her large eyes full of worry.

He'd come away from the meal feeling even more concerned and desperate to help than ever, but as he'd bid her goodbye, Bones had provided him with a glimmer of hope. She'd informed him that she wanted to come by his apartment to discuss something when she got back from New York. He had no idea what the topic of their conversation would be, but he sincerely hoped she was getting ready to fill him in so he could help fix whatever had been wrong the past few months.

"Seeley?" Cam's voice brought Booth out of his thoughts.

"Sorry, what?" he asked, realizing that his old friend had been trying to tell him something about the victim on the table.

"I was just saying that you won't need Dr. Brennan this afternoon anyways. I've been able to establish cause of death as suicide. There's no evidence of foul play here," she informed him.

"Oh, okay," Booth said, nodding his head. "I suspected as much, actually. The husband indicated she'd suffered from depression. Apparently, they'd been trying in-vitro fertilization with no success over the past two years. And then last week they were turned down for adoption…" Booth explained as Colin Fisher joined them on the platform.

"Sad situation," Cam commented.

"Every day of existence on this planet is sad," Fisher contributed in his usual depressing tone. Booth rolled his eyes and was about to leave the platform when Fisher perked up and continued speaking, completely dropping the melancholy act. "Speaking of in-vitro fertilization, do either of you know if Dr. Brennan has reconsidered her need for sperm?"

Booth felt his mouth drop open and he spun around to face the tall, depressed intern, sure he had misunderstood. "What did you say?" he demanded, somewhat harshly.

"I was merely asking if Dr. Brennan had revisited her plan for producing a progeny. I wanted to make sure she knew my sperm was still available. Although, of course, I realize your sperm would probably still be her first choice… The whims of the universe never fall in my favor."

"What? Bones wants my sperm?" Booth yelped. "What the hell is going on?" he continued, focusing his question towards Cam, who was looking a little stunned at the exchange that had just occurred. Nonetheless, Booth knew if he was going to get any reasonable answers, Cam was who he wanted to talk to.

"Booth… Seeley, why don't we discuss this in my office? The platform is kind of public…"

"Okay," Booth agreed quickly, stalking in the direction of Cam's office before whipping back threateningly to face Fisher. "And I had better never hear about you giving Bones your sperm—or any other bodily fluid—ever! Got that, Fisher? Not happening!"

After receiving a stunned nod from Fisher, Booth followed Cam to her office, his mind racing and trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together. Bones wanted sperm? So, she could have a _progeny_? If it hadn't been for the phrasing, Booth might've believed this was some sort of surreal dream, but somehow it would be just like Bones to talk about _producing a progeny_ rather than just saying that she wanted to have a baby… Booth shook his head as that thought sunk in. Bones wanted to have a baby and apparently she wanted it to be _his_!

"Cam, what just happened?" Booth asked, feeling lost, as the door to her office closed behind them.

"If it makes you feel any better, Booth, I'm pretty sure your reaction was fairly similar to this the first time you found out Dr. Brennan was considering having a baby," Cam told him.

"How… When… Just explain, please," Booth begged.

"Okay, well, a few months ago, Dr. Brennan announced to the entire team that she had decided she wanted to have a baby and raise it by herself. She also informed us that you were her preferred sperm donor because of your symmetrical features or something like that."

Despite the seriousness of the situation, Booth had to bite his lip to keep from smiling. He'd long ago learned that 'symmetrical features' was Bones-speak for 'really hot'. He absently wondered if she'd also mentioned his 'excellent musculature' before forcing himself to focus.

"She just announced this out of the blue?"

"Yes, apparently she informed you of her desire during a session with Dr. Sweets. I got the impression it came as a bit of a shock…"

"Bones always said she didn't want kids. And she hasn't said anything about this since my surgery… You claim she wanted my sperm for a baby, but she hasn't mentioned anything like that in the past three months!"

"It might be because she's a little embarrassed… She came up with this plan in late May, I think. But by the beginning of June, she'd totally dropped the whole thing. We all figured that you'd discussed it with her and made her see it was a little crazy…"

"A little crazy? Don't you mean insane?" Booth asked, shaking his head and wondering how he must've felt when this had all happened. It was bizarre to hear stories about yourself and your actions, but not to remember a thing about it.

He wondered what he had told Bones… Had he explained that one shouldn't make the decision to have a child rashly? Had he told her that a baby should have a mommy and a daddy who were together if it was possible? Or had he just outright refused her and hurt her so badly that she dropped the idea entirely? What if he had told she would be a bad mother? He didn't think she would be and he didn't think he would ever tell her such a thing, but what if he had panicked? Maybe that's why she seemed so sad. What if he had done something to crush her? Others failed to realize it sometimes, but his partner was so vulnerable when it came to things like family and love. It only would've taken one panicked moment for him to hurt Bones.

"We all certainly thought it sounded a little insane," Cam agreed with him. "But you know Dr. Brennan. She plays by her own set of rules. You must've set her straight though because she hasn't mentioned it since then."

Cam's words struck Booth as harsh suddenly and he prayed that he had been gentler when he discussed the topic with Bones. Yes, Bones' out of the blue plan to have a baby using his sperm was more than a little shocking and possibly insane, but her desire to be a mother wasn't insane. He had absolutely no doubt that Bones could be a wonderful and loving mother. It was just crazy for her to do it now, instead of waiting until she was in a solid and loving relationship with someone. _Preferably with me… _

Booth quelled that traitorous voice in his head immediately, but he couldn't ignore the feeling in his gut at the thought of Bones having his baby. It seemed so _right_. And the thought of Brennan having someone else's baby made him feel sick. Fisher! He prayed to God that she hadn't seriously considered that option. However, although Bones having his baby felt right, the thought of him just being a donor did not feel right. He'd want to be there for both of them. He'd want to be there to love both of them.

"Booth? You okay?"

Booth nodded, forcing his mind back to the conversation at hand. "Yeah, I'm still just a little shocked, I guess. Every time I start thinking that my memory loss really isn't that big of a deal, something like this happens."

"Yeah, I guess that is a bit of a bombshell. If it makes you feel any better, I can't think of any other major events during that period that Dr. Brennan might've neglected to mention to you."

"That's good, I guess," Booth muttered darkly.

"I'm sorry you found out this way, Seeley," Cam said, her eyes softening as she continued. "But I hope you aren't too angry with Dr. Brennan. I'm sure she was just trying to spare both of you embarrassment by not mentioning this. Also, with your brain tumor being discovered soon after, this whole baby debacle was probably pushed pretty far down on her priority list…"

Booth nodded, surprised by the affection in Cam's tone as she talked about Bones. At some point in the past three years, the coroner and the anthropologist had bonded. "I'm not angry at her. I even understand… It's just that I've been concerned about her recently. She seems worried; sometimes sad," Booth confided.

"Have you considered that your health scare might've affected her more than you realize? Dr. Brennan leads a solitary life. You are one of the most important relationships she has, as far as I know. Maybe she is still dwelling on how close she came to losing you…"

"I guess that could be part of it," Booth agreed although he had his doubts.

"She does love you. You know that, don't you?" Cam asked him off-handedly.

"I… She… She doesn't believe in love," Booth stuttered, caught off-guard.

"Doesn't matter… She might not realize it or recognize it, but she does. I saw her when you were having surgery, Booth. She couldn't have been more concerned if she was your wife. She loves you and anyone with eyes knows that you love her…"

"It's not like that," Booth tried to explain.

"It most definitely is, Seeley. You two just haven't realized it yet."

"I, I need to go, Cam. Thank you for telling me what happened."

Several hours later, Booth was driving aimlessly in his SUV. The baby revelation and Cam's blunt assessment of his and Bones' relationship had shaken him. He'd been able to admit to himself that he loved Bones for about a year now, but he didn't hold Cam's confidence that the feeling was reciprocated. Bones cared about him, certainly, and was his best friend, but she didn't believe in love. She believed in biological urges. And after their first case, she'd never given any indication that any of those urges were directed at him. She just didn't view him that way. He was her best friend, her closest friend. That was why she'd asked him for his sperm, not because she was in love with him.

Nonetheless, Fisher's revelation and his conversation with Cam had been enough to make him feel like his head might explode. That was why he'd been driving aimlessly for last few hours. He was trying to make sense of it all. He was sifting through the puzzle pieces: Bones' request for his sperm, his surgery, her large sad eyes, the way she refused to open up to him, and the conversation he didn't remember having where he'd talked her out of the baby idea. Booth knew that it all had to fit together somehow. He just wasn't sure he had all the pieces.

The ring of Booth's phone interrupted his contemplation.

"Booth," he answered, seeing Director Cullen's name on the caller ID.

"Booth, there's been an accident," Cullen's gruff voice was tight and noticeably distressed. Booth felt his stomach drop and his heart start beating double time. He'd never heard his boss sound quite like this before.

"What happened?" he demanded, not allowing his mind to speculate.

"There's been a plane crash, Booth. Dr. Brennan's flight crashed on take-off from Washington National."

**A/N: Yeah, I know, I left you on a cliff-hanger… I promise that I have a plan though and there will eventually be a happy B&B ending. This twist has been part of the plan from the beginning. Unfortunately, I won't be able to update tomorrow because I'm driving 12 hours by myself from Kansas to Houston. Expect the next update on Sunday. Please review and tell me what you think.**


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N: So, I made it safely back to school at about 3am last night. Then I spent today cleaning my dorm room and unpacking my stuff before writing this update for you. As a result, I'm a little sleep deprived, so please excuse any typos.**

Chapter Five

Booth was shaking and sweating profusely as he sped through traffic on his way to Arlington Memorial Bridge and the crash site of Flight 619. His tears were mixing with the rivulets of sweat on his face and there was a strange ringing in his ears that made his SUV's siren seem far-away.

They didn't know if there were any survivors yet. Cullen had told him what he knew, but no one knew whether or not there were any survivors yet. Flight 619 had suffered an engine failure soon after take-off. The small commuter jet had been too low to circle and return to the airport. The pilots had tried for a water landing on the Potomac, but the out of control plane had clipped the Arlington Memorial Bridge on its way down and crashed.

And as he drove, all Booth could think about was Bones and how she'd appeared this afternoon at lunch when she looked at him with her sad, pale eyes and told him that she wanted to talk with him when she got back from New York. He might never get to talk to her again.

_This is not happening._ Some part of his mind was trying to protect him. It was screaming out that this wasn't real and clinging to any possible shred of denial. But this was happening. His partner, the woman he loved, had been in a plane crash. And as much as he wanted to pretend otherwise, he knew that the statistics were not in her favor. When a commercial plane crashed, the majority of the time there were no survivors.

Booth ended up parking illegally near the Lincoln Memorial, several blocks away from where the plane went down. It was rush hour and with the Arlington Memorial Bridge now closed because of the crash, traffic was a mess. Booth sprinted towards the bridge and the emergency lights of rescuers, flashing his badge at anyone who got in his way.

As he got closer, Booth was stunned by how little there was to see. There were over a dozen emergency vehicles and fire trucks present, plus a helicopter circling around, but there was no plane. There were three burned-out cars on the bridge that had been extinguished, but the only evidence there had ever been a plane was the smell of jet fuel. If it hadn't been for the Coast Guard boats dragging the river below for wreckage and the smell, Booth would've thought the scene was just a car accident that had resulted in a bad fire.

After flashing his badge a number of times and yelling threateningly at anyone he met, Booth was finally directed to the head of the recovery operation. He felt a little bad about his conduct towards these professionals who were just trying to help, but this was about Bones! He had to know if there was a chance she'd survived and he would yell, threaten, or lie if that's what it took to find out.

"I need to know if there are any survivors," Booth demanded upon being introduced to a slightly-heavy middle-aged man named Fire Chief Lorenzo.

"Look, Buddy, I'm in the middle of a recovery effort here," Lorenzo said before going back to barking out orders over his radio.

"I know that, sir," Booth said flashing his badge. "But my partner is thought to have been on board the plane. She plays a vital role in national security and it is of the utmost importance to the FBI that her condition be determined as soon as possible!"

Lorenzo gave Booth a skeptical look, but he didn't call him out on his lie about national security. Instead he put the radio aside for a second and asked, "Your partner was on board?"

Booth felt his heart sink at the sympathy in the man's voice.

"Yes, Flight 619 from Washington National to LaGuardia," Booth replied.

"You say your partner's a woman?" Lorenzo confirmed.

"Yes, her name is Temperance Brennan," Booth said. For some reason, as he spoke, he flashed back to when he'd comforted her after they'd confronted the hit man that had killed her mother. He remembered how he'd held her in his arms as she repeated her name over and over again. Now he waited for Lorenzo to tell him that that complex and beautiful woman was dead.

"There were five people pulled out alive," Lorenzo finally said gruffly. "Only one was a woman though. A pregnant lady, about thirty… She lost consciousness before anyone got her name. Could that be your partner?"

Booth felt his world crumbling around him as the man confirmed his worst fears.

"No, that couldn't be her," he finally managed. It felt like his throat had closed up. "Is there any chance of more survivors being found?"

"No way, man… The five survivors were rescued from the river by bystanders within minutes of the plane going down. It's been over an hour now. I'm sorry, I really am, but there's no way," Lorenzo told him and Booth nodded, having expected the answer.

"Th-thanks for telling me… I'll let you get back to your job," Booth stuttered before turning and walking away from the scene.

He ended up back at the Lincoln Memorial, near where his SUV was parked. Darkness was falling now and the weather was quite cold for October, but Booth didn't care. He sat down on the steps of the Memorial, where he and Bones had sat together numerous times. Now they never would sit here together again. Booth didn't know if he was shivering from the cold or from the thought of Bones plunging to her death in an airplane, but he found that he couldn't stop shaking.

He'd seen friends killed in combat, watched them as they were shot down before his eyes, but he'd never felt as helpless as he did now. There was nothing he could do. There was no bullet he could step in front of, no bad guy he could shoot. Bones was just dead and it had been totally out of his control.

Tears were pouring down his face now. He thought of two hours ago, when he'd been agitated because of Bones' out-of-the-blue request for his sperm. None of it mattered anymore. What he wouldn't give for Bones to come to him with that or any other bat-shit plan right now… It would mean that she was still alive. But she wasn't. She was dead.

He was never going to see her again. She'd never tell him in that baffled, but adorable voice that she didn't know what it meant when he made a pop-culture reference… He'd never hear the words 'anthropologically-speaking' spill from her lips... She'd never kneel over a dead body in a Jeffersonian blue jumpsuit and tell him age, gender, and approximate time of death…

Now she was the dead body with an age, gender, and time of death… Her body was somewhere on the bottom of the Potomac, possibly burned or mangled beyond recognition, waiting to be identified. At that thought, Booth stood and rushed down the steps of the Memorial to a nearby bush. He vomited what was left in his stomach of the meal he'd eaten with Bones at the diner. A sob escaped Booth as he wiped his mouth.

_ This is not happening. _The words repeated over and over, like a lyric stuck in his head, but no matter how many times he repeated them, they weren't true. This wasn't a dream. This was happening. He couldn't cling to denial like he so desperately wanted to. There were five survivors on the plane and Bones wasn't one of them.

Booth's phone rang. He looked down at it. The caller ID told him it was Angela and for a moment, he seriously considered throwing his phone into the reflecting pool. He didn't want to have to tell Angela that her best friend was dead. If he talked to someone else about it, it would no longer be the hellish nightmare in his head. It would be permanent.

He didn't toss the phone into the pool. Instead he let it keep on ringing. Twenty minutes later, when Angela was calling him for the fourth time, he finally realized that he couldn't put off the inevitable and answered.

"Hey, Angela," he said, softly.

"Booth, you need to get your ass to the hospital, right now!" she informed him.

"Why?" he asked brokenly. "She's gone…"

"No, she's not, Booth," Angela said and Booth felt an unexpected flare of anger. How could Angela even dare to raise his hopes when he already knew the truth?

"Angela, I talked to the head of the rescue operation. He told me the only woman who survived was a pregnant lady…"

"Booth, listen to me! The pregnant lady is her!"

"What?" Booth asked, feeling a sensation in his chest that wasn't unlike his heart rapidly swelling and exploding.

"Bren is alive, Booth. We're at George Washington University Hospital and she's in surgery right now," Angela confirmed.

"I'm on my way," he said, leaping to his feet and closing the phone.

Booth had heard and understood Angela's revelation, but he immediately pushed it aside. Normally, it would've been major news, but right now he couldn't even think about it or consider what it meant. All he could focus on were the most important words Angela had said to him. Bones was alive.

**Author's Note: If you are curious about where this plot twist came from... In July of 1989, my mother was one of the survivors of the crash of United Flight 232 in Sioux City, Iowa. It took my dad hours to find out what her condition was after learning her plane had crashed. I based the specific circumstances of Brennan's plane crash on Air Florida Flight 90 which crashed into the Potomac River shortly after taking off from Washington National in 1982. If you're curious, you can read more about both crashes on wikipedia.  
**

**Classes start for me tomorrow and I'm taking 18 hours this semester, so updates may be slightly less frequent from now on. However, I've already got the entire thing planned out, so I promise not to leave you hanging too long between chapters. Please review!**


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N: Sorry for the delay in posting. The first week of classes has hit me like a truck. **

Chapter Six

"Where is she? How bad is she hurt?" Booth demanded as soon as he saw Angela and Hodgins in the waiting room at GW.

"Is he the husband?"

Booth had been so focused on finding out about Bones' condition that he hadn't even noticed the young black man sitting next to Angela until he spoke. The kid couldn't have been older than eighteen, but he was dressed in scrubs like he worked at the hospital.

"Booth, this is Ty Stark. He was near the bridge when the plane crashed. He saw Bren in the water and jumped in to pull her to shore," Angela explained, introducing the kid.

Booth shook Ty's hand, unable to think up words that satisfactorily communicated his gratefulness.

"So, are you her husband or boyfriend?" Ty asked curiously.

"No, I'm her FBI partner. How badly is she injured?" he asked desperately.

"Well, I'm no doctor, but when I first got to her she was conscious and struggling in the water. Once I got her to shore, I could tell her leg was really messed up and she had some serious-looking cuts to her face and neck from shrapnel. She passed out soon after we got out of the water, but she was coherent for a few seconds. She told me to tell the paramedics she was pregnant and then she told me to get Booth," Ty paused, "You're Booth?"

"Yes," Booth confirmed.

"Well, once she passed out a guy wrapped her in a blanket and the paramedics got there a few minutes later. I didn't go in the ambulance with her though. I came to hospital later because they were worried I might get hypothermia from the water. Once they checked me out and got me some dry clothes, I decided to wait around and see if I could find out how she was."

Booth nodded once and then looked at Angela. "We don't know anything else yet?"

"No. All they will tell us is that she's still in surgery," Angela replied.

"They didn't even budge when Angela offered to make a generous donation of my money to the hospital," Hodgins added with a shrug. It said something about Booth's state of mind that Angela trying to bribe the hospital for information using money that wasn't even hers seemed completely reasonable to him.

"You're her medical proxy though. You might have better luck," Angela added, perking up suddenly.

Booth had no more luck than Angela, however. The nurse even shot down the national security lie he'd used on the Fire Chief. She simply informed him that Brennan had been admitted as critical, but there was no update on her condition yet and he could sit in the waiting room until there was one. He returned, defeated, to sit by Angela, Hodgins, and Ty.

"Where are Cam and Sweets?" he asked after a moment, realizing they were missing members of their make-shift family.

"Cam got called to the crash site to help identify bodies… With a disaster of this magnitude, the D.C. coroner is overwhelmed."

Booth pushed way the sick feeling in his gut at the thought of all those bodies. "Does she know about Bones?"

"Yes, I got through to her with the news just after I talked to you. And Sweets went to tell Max about the crash. I was going to call him, but Sweets said news like this should be delivered in person if possible, so we sent him to do it," Angela explained.

Booth spent the next thirty minutes pacing the waiting room while Angela and Hodgins made small-talk with Ty. Booth learned that Ty was an eighteen-year-old freshman at George Washington University. He'd been walking home from his classes when the plane had crashed. He worked as a lifeguard to pay for school, so when he'd seen Brennan in the water, his instinct had been to dive right in. Eventually, Ty stood to leave.

"I've got class tomorrow morning, so I really should get home, but do you think one of you guys can call me as soon as you find out anything?" he asked Booth, writing his cell phone number down.

"Yes, of course," Booth answered. Without this kid, Bones might be at the bottom of the Potomac. "I, I can't even begin to thank you for getting her out of the water. I don't know what I'd do without her and I wasn't there to help her… Thank you for being there for her."

"It seemed like the right thing to do," Ty said and shook Booth's hand again.

"I'll let you know as soon as I know anything…"

Sweets and Max arrived soon after Ty departed. They'd greeted Booth solemnly and joined the vigil in the waiting room. After another hour of waiting, Booth found that he was itching to ask Angela about Bones' pregnancy, but it just didn't seem like the right time or place.

For starters, he wasn't sure if Sweets or Max were aware that Bones was pregnant. Surely they weren't, since he hadn't been aware of it until an hour ago. And if they didn't know, this certainly wasn't the time to inform them. Most importantly, however, was that it seemed like jumping the gun to ask about her pregnancy when they didn't even know if she was going to survive surgery. If she died, the entire thing would be moot. And even if she survived there was a chance she'd lose the baby because of her injuries. It seemed safest to totally disregard the issue for now and focus only on Bones.

It was after midnight when the trauma surgeon emerged with news about Bones. She was a petite woman who looked far too young to be a surgeon in Booth's opinion, but she introduced herself as Dr. Peters and requested to speak with Brennan's medical proxy privately. Surprisingly, Max and Angela didn't protest. Along with Hodgins and Sweets, they made themselves scarce while Dr. Peters talked to Booth.

"Okay, first of all, Mr. Booth, Dr. Brennan is out of surgery. She is still unconscious, but her condition is currently stable," Dr. Peters said, getting right to the point.

Booth felt his legs go weak with relief and he sank down onto one of the uncomfortable waiting room chairs. "Thank God," he couldn't help saying out loud. "What about her injuries?"

"Well, as you know, Dr. Brennan sustained serious injuries in the plane crash. Her major injuries are trauma to the right leg, several serious lacerations to her arms and face, and a concussion. We were able to set her leg, but there were multiple breaks including the femur, so we had to insert several rods and screws. It's possible that she may need further surgeries down the road to regain full function.

"We also removed all the shrapnel and sutured the lacerations. Most of them should heal without problem, but one was extremely serious. It caused penetrating trauma to Dr. Brennan's left eyeball. Dr. Cooper, our ophthalmologist, was able to save her eye, but it will take some time before her vision can be assessed and any permanent damage detected.

"Although Dr. Brennan's injuries are serious, she was very lucky. Considering the intensity of the forces involved in a plane crash, it's amazing that she only sustained a concussion and that she didn't suffer significant trauma to either her chest or abdomen. The head of our obstetrics department, Dr. Hodges, examined her and there are no signs of impending miscarriage. We are monitoring her baby closely, but the fetal heartbeat is strong and everything looks encouraging."

"Thank you," Booth said, nearly crying with gratitude and silently thanking God.

It was strange… He hadn't known Bones was pregnant until a few hours ago and he still didn't know who the father was, but his relief at finding out Bones' baby was okay was overwhelming. In fact, it was nearly as strong as the relief he felt about Bones herself being okay. Of course, maybe that was because Bones' well-being was dependent on her baby's well-being. If she'd lost her baby, Booth knew she would've been devastated, no matter how hard she tried to hide it from him and everyone else.

"Can we see her?" he asked the doctor.

"Yes, but the ICU only allows one visitor to stay overnight with the patient. Regular visiting hours start at eight. Do you have any other questions, Mr. Booth?"

"I… You're sure she's going to be okay?" He knew it was a stupid question and that Dr. Peters wouldn't be able to give him a one hundred percent assurance of anything, but he couldn't stop himself from asking.

"I can't promise anything, Mr. Booth, but Dr. Brennan is stable and I currently have no reason to expect complications. There is a very good chance that she will fully recover from her injuries with time."

Booth nodded and thanked the doctor again. Dr. Peters had barely departed the waiting room when the rest of Bones' family, led by Angela and Max, reappeared. Booth noted that Cam had arrived while he was speaking with the doctor. She looked exhausted and like she could use a long shower, but she was apparently as eager for an update as the rest of them.

"Bones made it through surgery. She's unconscious, but stable in ICU," he announced, appropriating the tactic Dr. Peters had used and declaring the most important point upfront. There were sighs of relief all around and Angela gave Booth such a tight hug that he lost his breath. Once she'd released him, he continued, sharing all the details the doctor had given him, but excluding any mention of Bones' pregnancy.

"She's allowed one visitor for the rest of the night," he added after giving all the pertinent details. "Max, since you're her father…"

"No, son," Max didn't let him finish. "I love my daughter and want nothing more than to be with her, but she made you her medical proxy for a reason. She wants you there when she's hurt. I'll see Tempe tomorrow morning with everyone else."

Booth knew he should protest, but the burning desire to see Bones was too strong, so he simply nodded as everyone else in the group murmured their agreement with Max. He was about to follow a nurse back to Bones' room when Angela caught his hand.

"That thing I mentioned on the phone?" she asked him softly, the concern in her tone apparent.

"The doctor said everything looked okay… No problems that they know of," he informed her, making eye contact so that his meaning was clear. Then keeping the same low voice so that no one would overhear, he asked, "Do you know who all knows?"

"Well, Hodgins knows now because Ty mentioned it, but I was the only one who already knew. I figured it out two weeks ago and she confirmed it when I asked," Angela told him. Booth could tell by the way Angela had phrased it that she wanted him to know that Bones hadn't intended to tell her first. He appreciated the gesture, but it didn't mean much to him right now. He was still too concerned about Bones to care much about the specific circumstances of her pregnancy and why she hadn't told him about it. Until Bones was one hundred percent better, nothing else really mattered.

"Mr. Booth, this way," the nurse caught his attention and Booth handed the slip of paper Ty had given him to her.

"Can you call Ty? He wanted to know if she was okay…"

Angela agreed and then Booth followed the nurse out of the waiting room. Despite already knowing about Bones' major injuries, he felt nervous to see her. It was never easy to see Bones hurt and Peters' description of her condition had caused him to conjure up all sorts of horrific images in his mind. He imagined her beautiful face disfigured by shrapnel and her leg mangled beyond repair and it made him feel sick. It didn't matter though. She was still Bones and he had to see her.

"Mr. Booth, right in here," the nurse said pointing him to Room 317.

He thanked her and then, taking a deep breath, he pushed the door open.

**A/N: Please review! Hopefully, I'll have a new chapter for you sometime in the next few days. In the meantime though, I'm off to read Three Soldiers by John Dos Passos for my American Literature class.**


	8. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

It wasn't as bad as Booth had imagined. Yes, Bones looked small and vulnerable lying there unconscious in the hospital bed, but it wasn't as bad as the nightmare images his mind had cooked up. Her leg was in traction and she was hooked up to a number of machines and IVs, but it was still his beautiful, brilliant partner.

He approached her bedside carefully. Most of left side of her face, focusing over the eye, had been dressed with bandages, but he could still recognize her despite the bandages and the bruising from her injuries. Her face was relaxed and her breathing was even. Looking at her auburn hair, spread on the pillow like a halo, he ignored the injuries and pretended she was just asleep for a few moments. He wanted to touch her, but he was afraid he might hurt her.

Carefully, Booth took her limp right hand. It was undamaged, small and warm under his own hands, but he could see various places on both her arms where lacerations had been sutured and bandaged, so he was careful not to jostle her.

"Bones, I'm here," he told her gently. "I'm right here for you and I'm not going to leave until you force me to…"

He glanced at the machines she was hooked up to, grateful for the steady beeping and humming that reassured him she was stable and okay.

"You're going to be all right, Bones, I promise. And your baby is okay too…"

Booth found his eyes drawn to Bones' midsection as he thought of her baby. He was surprised to realize that she was showing a little, a small swell apparent under the thin hospital gown. For a moment, he was shocked and he wondered how he could've failed to notice before now, but he quickly came to the conclusion that it was because he hadn't known to look for it. Before his discussion with Cam this afternoon, he hadn't even considered the idea of Bones being pregnant. And the bump wasn't that obvious yet, especially if Bones had intentionally been dressing to conceal it.

Why had she kept it from him? Yes, she must've been hurt when he'd refused to donate for her, but didn't he still deserve to know? They went out in the field together. What if something had happened to her baby because she got hurt in the field and he hadn't known? She should've told him so that he could protect her better at the very least.

Booth sighed. He knew this train of thought was useless right now. He was upset because she'd gotten hurt and there was nothing he could do about it. Even if he had known about the baby, he still wouldn't have been able to do anything. She'd been in a plane crash. Short of locking her in the lab for the rest of her life, he couldn't prevent something like that.

Normally when Bones got hurt, Booth felt almost crushing guilt about not protecting her well enough. He didn't right now. The plane crash hadn't been his fault. There was absolutely nothing he could've done. So, instead of feeling guilt, he felt a bizarre sort of rage at the universe, or fate, or maybe God. The rage was bizarre though, because it was tempered by an equally strong feeling of gratefulness to the universe, and fate, and God. The whims of the universe had allowed Bones to be involved in this terrible accident, but she'd also survived it when so many others involved hadn't.

"I love you, Bones," Booth spoke the words softly and hesitantly. Never before had he had the nerve to speak them out loud, but now he felt compelled. There were dozens of families that would never get to tell their loved ones how they felt ever again. The least he could do was stop being a coward and tell the woman he loved that he did, in fact, love her. Admittedly, the act felt somewhat minimized since Bones was unconscious, but when she was better, Booth vowed he would tell her again.

* * *

Brennan's return to consciousness was gradual. At first, she was only aware of the cocoon of warmth she seemed to be wrapped in. She lingered in that semi-conscious state for an undetermined length of time. Then, slowly, the noise of her surroundings began to penetrate her foggy brain. There was the soft hum and beeping of machines. Brennan was still too out of it for the noise to be meaningful, however. Awhile later, Brennan became aware of a much less pleasant sensation and that was what finally dragged her back to the land of the living.

She hurt all over. The pain wasn't sharp or agonizing, but it was an all-encompassing ache. What had happened to her? She hadn't opened her eyes yet, but she was pretty sure she was in a hospital. She didn't remember getting hurt though… Had she and Booth been on a case? Brennan fought to remember anything…

_Brace for impact!_

The brief flash of memory was so clear and vivid that Brennan jerked a little, causing a spike of pain in her leg that was far more intense than anything she'd felt so far. Brennan wasn't paying attention to the pain now though because the flash of memory had been enough to trigger a whole cascade of memories. She'd been in a plane crash… Brennan's un-bandaged eye finally popped open as a wave of panic flooded over her.

"Bones, it's okay, you're safe!"

Booth was here. Normally, his warm brown eyes and soothing words would calm her, but nothing could calm her right now. Her plane had crashed. She remembered the moments before impact… The terror of falling out of the sky... She'd known the statistical probability of her own survival had been poor, but all she'd been able to think about was her baby.

"Booth, my, my…" Brennan struggled to give voice to her distress. Her throat was dry and her brain seemed to be jammed. She was trying to ask Booth about her baby, but she was torn between needing to know and the terror of what she might find out.

"Bones, its okay… You're okay and your baby is okay," Booth answered her unspoken question clearly and forcefully, leaving no room for doubt or misunderstanding. Brennan felt her panic drain away and she relaxed back against her pillow, breathing heavily. Booth was still speaking to her and one of his large warm hands had come to rest on top of her right hand, which she'd instinctively placed over her stomach.

"I, I… You're sure?" she finally managed to ask even though she knew that Booth would never lie to her.

"I talked to your doctor a few hours ago. The baby's heart beat is strong and there isn't any bleeding," he said, rubbing the top of her hand softly. She closed her eye and allowed herself to absorb his words. Her baby was okay. She felt tears of relief overcoming her.

"Hey, don't cry, Bones… Everything is okay. Everything is going to be great. Your baby is fine and you're going to be fine too even though you got banged up a little… Do you want me to get your doctor?"

"No, stay… Please, just stay," Brennan said, gripping Booth's hand so he couldn't get up and leave. They sat like that in silence for a few minutes as Brennan carefully attempted to organize her thoughts and assess the situation. Her brain was fuzzy from what she suspected were some heavy-duty painkillers, so it took longer than usual.

The memories of the crash were trying to claw their way into her mind, but for the present, she carefully compartmentalized them away. Instead, she focused on assessing her injuries. Her leg was in traction and she suspected that she'd suffered a complex femur fracture and tibia and fibula fractures based on the way it had been set. She also seemed to have suffered an injury to her face. She couldn't feel any pain from it, unless one counted the general headache she had, but one side of her face was covered in bandages.

"Booth, how badly am I hurt?" she finally asked softly.

Brennan listened carefully as Booth gave a surprisingly detailed account of her injuries. She could tell from the depth of his explanation that he must've pestered her surgeon with a number of questions. It made her feel safe and protected to know he cared so much. He confirmed her suspicions about her broken leg and also explained that she suffered a serious eye injury.

"Did I lose my eye?" she asked calmly. She was concerned, of course, but considering the seriousness of a plane crash, losing an eye seemed like a relatively low price to pay.

"No, they saved it, but it'll be a few weeks before your vision can be assessed," Booth explained. "Are you sure you don't want me to get your doctor? I'm sure she can answer your questions better than I can…"

"No, not yet… I, I don't want you to leave…"

"Bones, I'm never going to leave you…"

Brennan nodded and felt tears threatening again from his caring words. She knew she needed to talk to him about the baby, but she just wanted to close her eyes and soak up his comforting presence. Things were still so confused and fuzzy… Brennan felt herself grow drowsy and she knew she was going to fall asleep again.

"Booth…" she said softly, not bothering to open her eye.

"What is it, Bones?" he asked and she felt his hand gently cup her cheek.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the baby… I should've told you…"

"Hey, don't worry about that, Bones… It's okay. Just sleep…"

**A/N: So, I know Booth and Brennan didn't really discuss the baby much in this chapter, but they will eventually when Brennan is a little stronger. Brennan also isn't going to be able to compartmentalize her memories of the plane crash forever, so those issues will be dealt with in the upcoming chapters too. Please review and tell me what you think!**


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